I want to apologize up front to the regular readers of this blog. Long time followers certainly know the drill at this point. This is the third time in this blogs history that I go off on a Super Bowl tangent.

Faithful readers shouldn’t despair however, there’s still plenty going on within our fine company (like Carnival’s Sail-A-Thon this Thursday) that will keep me on topic leading up to this year’s Super Bowl.

After last night’s victory over the New York Jets in the AFC Championship game, in the mist of all the excitement and celebration after the game I witnessed Ben Roethlisberger down on one knee. A towel covering his face, he took a very private moment to himself in what I believe was a moment of gratitude and prayer.

You would have had to under a rock this past off season not to hear about Ben’s off field exploits and how it shamed not only himself and his family – but Steeler Nation as a whole. The Steeler franchise is a very proud organization, and growing up in this blue collar town, there’s a very distinct and visible line between right and wrong.

While charges were never filed surrounding Ben off the field activities, the Court of Public Opinion certainly had a very potent odder, that for some lingers to this day.

Some will tell you that you can’t change the past, and to a certain extent that’s true. In contrast, I’ve always been taught that you can change the past – by changing today. Those that can actually learn from our experiences instead of dwelling on them in a “Woe is me” mentality – can and do come out of horror stories like Ben’s.

And they’re better people for it.

At the end of the regular season, Ben won The Chief Award, an honor given by local members of the Pro Football Writers to the Steelers player “who best exemplifies the spirit of cooperation with the media.” For as much as the media maligned him for his extracurricular activities and poor personal decisions last spring, (especially the Pittsburgh Media) that’s a huge accomplishment.

You may not think such an award is a big deal. (Most have never heard of the award to begin with.) Considering how this circle of writers interacts with Ben on a regular basis however, they’ve obviously seen a dramatic change in Ben’s attitude and behavior – and that speaks volumes.

That was the regular season with very localized media exposure. Now Ben has an opportunity to show both National and International Media how much he’s changed given his third trip to the Super Bowl in six years.

Don’t think for a second that what happened last spring won’t come up during the next two weeks. It was a huge story – and cost Ben the first four games of the regular season with a suspension. As one writer wrote:

“The Super Bowl’s story machinery can be overwhelming. Small issues become large, major stories become gargantuan. It’s part of what makes the game and the weeks leading up to it great, and not so great.”

In other words, this story is going to be rehashed over the next two weeks at a level that will make it look like it all happened yesterday. Fortunately for Ben, he’s much stronger and wiser than he was last March. It’s a good thing – because unlike last March, he’s not going to be able to go into hiding.

It’s not that winning another Super Bowl or simply being nice to the media equates to full redemption for Ben. He still has this off season to contend with – where all of his troubles seem to stir from. The motorcycle accident in 2006, the Las Vegas fiasco the following off season, and most recently his poor choices in Georgia this past year.

Personally, I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom. I was just a little younger than Ben is now when I changed my life and direction. In order to make it complete, it needs to be a TOTAL transformation – both on and off the field. He’s made it through the regular season, now almost through the post season. We’ll have to wait and see what the upcoming off season has in store for Ben.

Can this current season carry him into the off season and complete Ben’s transformation? I think it can if he follows the same path that got him to the biggest stage in the world. Like his play – it may not be all that pretty – but the man is born leader on the gridiron. I’ve never seen anyone extend and make plays the way Ben does. He never quits.

And he won’t quit on himself.

Ben started the regular season watching his team from home. He’s now on the cusp of leading his team to its seventh Super Bowl Championship and Lombardi Trophy for this storied franchise. Some scorned the Commissioner Rodger Goodell for suspending Ben to begin with – since there were never any charges filed. In my personal opinion, I think it was the best thing that ever happened. It was just the bitter tonic he needed to swallow that made Ben hit bottom. He didn’t have to lose it all – but losing four games may have been enough to get Ben on the right track.

We have to see how the game goes in two weeks – and then the dreaded off season begins for Ben, the rest of the Steelers, and the fans.

Let’s not forget the attitude and actions that got you here Ben. How grateful you are for this opportunity coming up. There can be more – if you are truly changed.

For the record, I think you are. Been there, got the t-shirt and last night I saw it after the game. I along with others have seen it all season long.

While your transformation isn’t quite complete – your current path on and off the field will lead you there.

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I spent part of my day yesterday reading up on the NFL’s Sunday Night Football match up between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Baltimore Raven’s.

Since late October, early November the League has been cracking down on “illegal hits”, threatening to suspend, but thus far only flagging and fining players in an effort to make the game safer. The cry from Pittsburgh (both fans and players) in recent weeks has been that the League has been playing “favorites” – or more succinctly targeting the Steelers unfairly.

When reporters asked Head Coach Mike Tomlin during last weeks Press Conference concerning any kind of fairness issue over penalties and fines his response was classic.

“Man, life isn’t fair. I’m not concerned about fairness. I’m really not. I’m concerned with preparing for the Baltimore Ravens.”

Two weeks ago Ben Roethisberger broke a small bone in his foot after being gang sacked by the Buffalo Bills. Sunday night during Pittsburgh’s first series of plays Haloti Ngata landed left to Big Ben breaking his nose, leaving it bloody and out of shape. (Giving new meaning to Nose Tackle.) Note – Ngata’s left was during an actual play – unlike the sucker punch right dealt by Richard Seymour after the play three weeks ago against Oakland that got Seymour ejected from the game.

While watching Ben exit the field with blood dripping and his noise badly disjointed I could hear the cry’s from Pittsburgh all the way down here in Atlanta. Having had my nose broken twice, I knew it wasn’t anything that would take Ben out of the game. (The guy was playing with a broken bone in his foot after all.)

The big question that comes up for Steelers fans time and time again is why the League doesn’t protect Big Ben like they do with Quarterbacks like Brady or Manning(s).

Personally, I wouldn’t want to be classed in the same category as a Brady or Manning. Not because I don’t think these Quarterbacks are worthy of the position – they’re Hall of Fame Quarterbacks in their own right. Reothlisberger plays on a completely different level however – and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Take the play late in the fourth quarter for instance. Roethlisberger made one of the most athletic plays I’ve ever seen – escaping Terrell Suggs who was also swiping at Ben’s head grabbing his helmet – enabling Ben to throw the ball away and avoid the sack. If it were Brady or Manning, my bet is that both would have been whistled dead for being “in the grasp”. Saving that valuable real estate gave Pittsburgh the opportunity to score the go ahead touchdown just a few plays later that ultimately won the game and placed the Steelers in sole possession of first place in the AFC North.

When change your perspective about the game – suddenly what appears to be a liability turns into an asset – and winners find a way to do just that.

I’ve seen the same thing in business. Over the years, the Travel Industry has pulled every sucker punch they can come up with to cripple Travel MLM’s. The industry convinced one large cruise line to terminate it’s partnership with the most threatening Travel MLM at the time. When other vendors failed to follow suit, the industry rejoiced when California slapped a $25 million law suit on the company with claims that it was nothing more than a gigantic pyramid scheme.

Some call that unfair as well, but from my perspective it’s merely a nuisance that validates how dominant our model really is. In much the same way people get bent out of shape about Ben’s off the field shenanigans – when it comes to producing on the field, nobody can question his desire and heart on the field. The man finds a way to win – and so does the company I’ve been privileged to represent for almost 6 years now – YTB Travel Network.

Mike Tomlin is right – life is unfair – but you can’t get sidetracked with differing views or perspectives that don’t have any bearing on what’s played during the game. You find a way to win – despite how unfair it appears to be. While it’s frustrating, it really doesn’t matter come game time.

You too – need to be resilient from head to toe to win the game.

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I haven’t been to St. Vincent College since Chuck Noll was head coach of the Steelers. Since Noll retired there have only been two other Head Coach’s from 1992 on. (The same year I moved here to Atlanta.) Some NFL teams change Coach’s every three to four years – but for the Pittsburgh Steelers it’s been three Coach’s in four decades.

In a long standing tradition (like forty five years) the Pittsburgh Steelers open training camp in Latrobe, PA tomorrow. After the events of this past off season about all I can say is – it’s about time.

The Pittsburgh Steelers have never been a much talked about team during the off season in years past – but this off season has been much different story.

The team won’t have quarterback Ben Roethlisberger for at least the first four to six games because of his NFL suspension. The offense will also be without wide receiver and Super Bowl XLIII MVP Santonio Holmes who was traded to the Jets after another off field stunt. Fast Willie Parker is now a Washington Redskin as we find out what running back Rashard Mendenhall is really made of. And to add insult to injury, our offensive line also lost tackle Willie Colon due to a season ending Achilles during spring training.

There really hasn’t been much said about the Defensive side of the ball – probably due to age and maturity. The Defensive squad however, needs to get back to smash mouth football that’s capable of shutting offenses down. (How many games did we lose in the last minute a year ago?) You can’t blame the absence of Troy Polamalu for all those last minute losses.

Nor can you blame me for the fresh start this year’s training camp offers die hard Steelers fans. (Certainly more than in years past.) It’s one thing to get use to all the free agent activities that are now common in the League – but this year’s off field activities from certain Pittsburgh Steelers was something no Steelers fan thought was even possible.

As a lifelong Steelers fan and the proud tradition this team has held for decades, it’s shocking that I feel this way.

But…

Thank goodness we get some of these guys off the street and back on the football field.

In one of the few interviews I saw on the internet from Ben Roethlisberger and the fiasco that happened in Milledgeville, Georgia this off season he said something that really stuck with me.

“I’m always committed to being the best I can on the football field, I don’t think that’s ever changed, and I don’t think anyone’s ever questioned that of me.”

There no question the kids got drive and talent. You saw that from the very first game he was thrown into down in Miami during a monsoon his rookie year. He reeled off 15 straight victories his rookie year – a record I don’t think will ever be broken. Since then he’s collected two Super Bowl rings and is unquestionably the offensive leader of the Pittsburgh Steelers. With the opening of training camp – it’s back to a focus on football without time for extracurricular activities that he shouldn’t be doing in the first place. Thus, why he’s still labeled a “kid”, and for me, it will stay that way until his on field maturity matches his off field activities.

Regardless of each players commitment on the field, Mike Tomlin has his work cut out for him this year – probably more so than previous years. The Rooney’s believe in him – with a new contract extension – and while I had my doubts early on (mostly due to the lack of head coaching changes with the Steelers since 1969) Tomlin has proven that he’s the right guy for this year’s challenges.

St. Vincent gets Steelers fans back into their comfort zone. It’s rich in tradition and always brings optimism regardless of how good or bad the previous year’s record was.

This year, we can add a bad off season into the mix, and tomorrow (thank goodness) it comes to a close.

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I use to hate the NFL off season. There was never anything going on with the Pittsburgh Steelers. They’d just quietly go about their business and fans like me would crave anything that would reconnect with me the team during the off season. If and when this proud and historic franchise ever gets back to “boring” – trust me, I’ll be the last one to complain.

While I’ve kept quiet about all these off season and off field activities I have been kept a very close eye on the embarrassing antics of these very young, and very dumb jocks, mostly via the sport media on Television and via the internet. The news appeared to come to a head yesterday as Santonio Holmes was traded to the New York Jets for his off field antics in Florida and Ben Roethlisberger’s embarrassment has been dropped by the District Attorney here in Georgia.

Neither were surprising.

Santonio was in the last year of his contract in 2010 and while he’s been a dynamic player (a Super Bowl MVP as a matter of fact) he never seemed to fit the Steelers mold as a blue color type of player. It’s one thing to quote that “it’s time to be great” on the field, but it’s another to “be great” in all other areas of your life. He’s always reminded me of Plaxico Burress – who eventually ended up winning a Super Bowl ring with the New York Giants. But Burress couldn’t get out of his own way long enough to keep him out of jail. As it stands right now, Santonio is heading in that same direction.

I hope he can straighten his life out – and I know it’s possible – but only Santonio can control that. Currently, I see absolutely no indication from Santonio that he even cares to change. In fact, the way I see it, his arrogance continues to grow without any sign that he’s willing to act like a respectable adult.

Ben’s apology and statement last night however, does tell of remorse and a desire to be the role model the NFL and Pittsburgh fans want him to be. Saying it, and actually doing it however are two different things. The talk IS starting to wear a bit thin – even for me.

Just because criminal charges have not been filed does not mean that Ben’s completely off the hook. We have two other factors that we’re still awaiting a final outcome from the Rooney family and from the NFL Commissioner himself. Here’s Roger Goodell’s conduct policy :

“It is not enough simply to avoid being found guilty of a crime. You are held to a higher standard and expected to conduct yourself in a way that is responsible, promotes the values upon which the league is based, and is lawful.

“Persons who fail to live up to this standard of conduct are guilty of conduct detrimental and subject to discipline.”

At this point, the Rooney’s have already made a sufficient statement with Santonio, trading him to the New York Jets for a fifth round draft pick next week. It wouldn’t surprise me if the Rooney family is satisfied with whatever the Commissioner hands down for Ben and allow whatever punishment he sees fit to speak for the family as a unified voice of how a Pittsburgh Steeler should conduct themselves off the field.

For as long as I’ve been a Pittsburgh Steeler fan, that’s been the Rooney way. I can count on one hand the number of players that were busts off the field like Santonio and Ben have been. (Joe Gilliam, Bam Morris, Eric Green and Plaxico Burress.) We as fans and supporters are pretty spoiled in that regard.

Both Ben and Santonio have a chance to redeem themselves in the public eye at this point. They can use this experience to help other players and fans alike if done the proper way. That’s what good role models do. As fans we need to remember that getting bitter and angry about either situation serves no one. From some of the comments I’ve seen on some of the message boards and blogs, both Santonio and Ben are living “rent free” inside the heads of these fans and/or critics who for one reason or another need to feel like a victim – that’s why they side for the victims in both cases.

What these boys need are tools to help them become responsible and respectable members of our society as men. Not some bogus judgment that only serves as a prop to elevate the one who is casting judgment.

Bottom line for me is both are very young, very rich, and neither fully understand the responsibilities they have as an NFL player and role model. That may come with age, and from taking personal responsibility for their actions. I remember hitting bottom at 25 when I quit drinking – so I know it’s possible.

Time will tell if it’s actually doable for both Santonio and Ben.

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UPDATE: Don’t know why I should be surprised that everyone else is looking for this poem as well. (More than likely wanting to read it and possibly copy it for themselves.) Want your own copy of the poem “Don’t Quit”? I created a PDF that you can print out and hang where you want. Mine is on the bathroom mirror.

Enjoy!

~~~~

The NFL Network has aired the newest release of it’s Emmy Award-winning ‘America’s Game’ with “The Story of the 2008 Pittsburgh Steelers”. You know me, I not only had to watch it, but it’s permanently saved on my TiVo to watch for years to come.

Each episode of America’s Game is a personal portrait told by the men who lived it and felt it. The story of the 2008 Steelers is told through the eyes of head coach Mike Tomlin, Troy Polamalu and Ben Roethlisberger.

I love the heart and the mentality of a champion and believe there is something we can not only learn but implement in our own lives to help us achieve our goals and dreams.

I wish I had a video of this one segment I could share with you, but it’s simply not available anywhere on the internet just yet. Instead I’ll have to share it with you in print.

Roethlisberger developed his resiliency on the field as a quarterback at Miami University under then-head coach Terry Hoeppner. Coach Hep, who died of brain cancer in 2007, remained a main source of inspiration for Roethlisberger through his favorite poem, “Don’t Quit.”

Roethlisberger on Coach Hep: “He just was an amazing person. More than a coach, I really was like a son to him.”

Roethlisberger on the poem, “Don’t Quit”: “[Coach Hep] would read it to us once or twice a year. He would get really into it and emotional about it. It was really something special, especially when he passed, so I put the poem up in my locker so that every day I could see it and know that no matter what, don’t give up, don’t quit.”

Just the title alone prompted me to do a quick search for this poem and found it so meaningful and inspiring, I wanted to share it with the rest of you.

“Don’t Quit”

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest! if you must; but don’t you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don’t give up, though the pace seems slow;
You might succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor’s cup.
And he learned too late, when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit;
It’s when things seem worst that you mustn’t quit.

~ Anonymous

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Not the way you would like to start the year.

Earlier in the week news of a civil lawsuit came out against two time Super Bowl Champion of the Pittsburgh Steelers, Ben Roethlisberger. Just weeks before he heads to St. Vincent College in Latrobe, Ben finds himself the center of media attention accused of rape. Ben and the Steelers will be defending last years Lombardi Trophy going into the 2009 season. (Make that SIX Lombardi Trophies.)

A 31-year-old Nevada woman filed the civil lawsuit alleging the Super Bowl winning quarterback raped her in a hotel penthouse last year. The woman was working as a VIP casino host at Harrah’s Lake Tahoe at the time, and claims in the lawsuit the rape took place in Roethlisberger’s room after he called her saying that the sound on his TV was not working.

I read a news report that said that Ben was the one who made the bogus complaint, (that being the sound not working) but after a full year of silence, and this woman not even filing a police report makes me question which complaint is bogus. Roethlisberger made his first public statement yesterday afternoon and vowed to fight what he called “outrageous allegations.” Clearly agitated about the fact the he is in the public eye over something like this he spoke these words yesterday at the Pittsburgh training facility:

“The allegations against me are reckless and false,” Roethlisberger said. “As much as I’d like to answer everyone’s questions I’m going to respect the legal process and I’m confident that the truth will prevail.”

Roethlisberger’s attorney, David Cornwell, released a statement also saying the charges were false:

“The timing of a lawsuit and the absence of a criminal complaint and a criminal investigation are the most compelling evidence of the absence of any criminal conduct,” he said.

This isn’t the first time we’ve seen this kind of stunt. Back in 2002 “The Bus”, (Jerome Bettis) was accused of sexually assaulting a woman in Westmoreland County. When police went to investigate, about two dozen people and learned of a plan by the woman’s Uncle to get money from Bettis by manufacturing a sexual misconduct charge.

The charges against “The Bus” were soon dropped.

While I don’t personally know the two time Super Bowl Champion, from what I’ve read about him, seen of him, and the leadership I’ve witnessed over the last 5 years on the football field, I’m betting that this case will be dropped as well.

There, I think lies the crux of this issue. This isn’t about rape, but about Ben’s status. Like the money grab that was thrown out of court filed against YTB earlier in the week, this too is about taking unfair advantage of a situation in search of an easy buck. From what I’ve seen in some reports, the allegations in the suit filed against Ben are so flimsy that it too could be thrown out by a Judge when the time comes to put it on the docket.

Call it jealousy, bitterness or anger over someone being more successful than you are. People find all kinds of creative ways to bring someone down to their level, and it doesn’t have to be about money. Because of my status here on the internet, and doing what I love to do, people poke at me all the time. This week is a perfect example.

I broke the story here on the internet about YTB’s class action being thrown out, and admittedly rubbed it in the face of all the critics who had been yammering for almost a year about how this would crush YTB. While we in YTB have been celebrating that the truth finally coming to light, critics have pulled the egg off their own face and are attempting to throw it back in mine.

I read late last night in amusement a day long dialog concerning my inability to support my wife and my family. The claims of being an embarrassment to children for being an MLM junkie and that my wife of 12 years is ready to throw me out of the house surrounded the conversation. In addition, I found out that I’m also broke.

Apparently being open about participating in an MLM and writing about my experience, makes me powerful and important enough that some spent time and energy digging for anything they could find to convince themselves and others that I’m not worth listening to. (Ironic I know.)

What they dug up was a credit card battle we are entangled in to anger and feed the illusions and myths surrounding MLM’ers. In 2008, two of our credit card companies decided to jack up our interest rates to what we felt was excessive, and were unwilling to lower their rates. After seeking legal counsel, the only way we could get their attention was to cut all the cards off, and stop paying them. What resulted was a list of law suits from every one of the credit card companies demanding their money. While this has been unpleasant and time consuming, we are in fact making settlements on amounts that we mutually agree upon to resolve the debt owed. Under the advisement of counsel, it was the only way we would be able to pay only the amount we owed for the purchases we actually made, and not the exorbitant interest that the banks wanted.

But alas, the pitch is that we got in so deep that we couldn’t get out and are now putting the burden on them (as taxpayers no less) so it can feed their anger and resentment towards yours truly. None of these spineless weasels would realize how to stand up for ones self or how to take personal responsibility if their life depended on it. It’s never about them and how they can spend an entire day posting on the internet instead of being productive and providing income to put food on the table for themselves and possibly their families.

And through it all, not a peep surrounding a reckless and false class action that was just thrown out which previously was thought to be a “powerful” lawsuit by the same group. Misguided as it is, none of them dare call out the Judge who spanked the Plaintiff’s in their redundant, immaterial, impertinent, or scandalous class action lawsuit.

Instead, yours truly is called out for “pimping”, while others see value in what I’ve done switching over to WordPress for their own business blog, and not only using Aweber for their own newsletter, but using a similar look and feel with the same logos I have for Twitter and Facebook.

Me thinks thou dost protest too much.

Angry? Hardly. While they do say one thing on the internet slamming me, the actions of following my lead show signs of respect for which I am flattered. Not to mention the attention and time spent obsessing and talking about little ol’ me. The lesson learned here is that if you don’t like the heat, you need to stay out of the kitchen. Being in the public eye, and being open about who you are and proud of what you do will attract pot shots and blows below the belt from people who need to focus on someone else’s faults so they don’t have to look at their own.

I’ve yet to meet anyone who’s perfect and doesn’t have a few skeletons in their own closet. I’ve been very open about my alcoholism for example. The difference is, I’m able to use it as an advantage after 20 years of sobriety. I wrote a piece yesterday on my Examiner column about using credit cards responsibly. Personally, I think taking my own experience, good or bad, can be used as a lesson for someone else who might be in the same boat. Of course that’s why so many appreciate what I do here and on my newsletter because I inform and educate those that are willing to grow both personally and professionally. Those that aren’t spend their time as some anonymous screen name on a message board picking apart someone else’s life.

Sad and disappointing to be sure, but that’s the life they choose. The key however is not to give them the same power and control you apparently have on them. Correct it, disarm it, and let it go so you can move on. Those that are able to see the truth for what it is will follow, and those who don’t…

Thanks for sharing.

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