One of the reasons why I like Thanksgiving so much is because it’s the one time of year that most people take the time to be thankful. If some would realize what gratitude would do for their daily lives, a lot more people would use the practice on a daily – or at least weekly basis. The concept of stinkin’ thinkin’ would be a thing of the past.
As I start to formulate some of my goals and things I want to accomplish moving into 2010, there’s been a new resurgence of late about using gratitude as a daily practice. I do take time nearly every day to think about things I should be grateful for. Just this little effort has been so profound, that I’m not only doing more and more of it, but it’s one of the first New Years Resolutions on my 2010 list.
If you’ve watched the movie “The Secret” or read anything related to personal development and self improvement, one of the most significant and simple things you can do to improve any outcome is taking the time each day to write down a few things you’re grateful for. It doesn’t need to be fancy (although I’ve seen “Gratitude Journals
” you can purchase for this very practice) but it should be done as a way of moving the negative things out of the way and allowing more positive and meaningful events and opportunities into your life.
Earlier this week I caught wind that Oprah is ending her long running talk show after 25 years. I may have seen her show less than 5 times for whatever reason in all those years. One of those times was to watch an episode with the teachers of “The Secret”. I believe it was James Arthur Ray who said you can’t receive anything new until you let go of the old. It’s like trying to fill a bucket – you can’t fill it with anything new, until you empty out some of it’s current contents. It’s a known scientific fact that the mind can’t compute two opposite thoughts or feelings at the same time. You can’t be both angry and happy at the same time. You can’t picture a tall building and a small building at the same time, and you can’t think about being sick and healthy at the same time.
What a gratitude journal does is help you empty out the old negative thoughts and feelings and replace them with more meaningful and useful thoughts that empower you. Your life always moves in the direction of the minds most dominant thought. Have you ever noticed how people who always complain about being sick are always sick? The people who constantly complain about bad things happening to them or always complain “why” have such bad luck?
Transversely, those who are constantly happy go lucky always have all the luck. Those who talk about moving up the company ladder are the ones sitting in the posh corner office with the new promotion.
This Thanksgiving, I have very personal and practical experience of what letting go of the old – negative aspects in your life and replacing them with new more empowering thoughts of gratitude can do.
About 2 months ago I made a choice to put the YTB critics on ignore. I quit reading the garbage and trash talk because the practice had broken through responsible and respectable social norms. The ideas and perspective of this small group had never matched my own experience or knowledge obtained from more reliable and unbiased sources. Furthermore, throughout this last year others who were exposed to the tactics labeled their activity as “redundant, immaterial, impertinent, or scandalous matter” while another outside source called the emotional outbursts a “bizarre and complete waste of time“.
Therefore, I made the choice to let it all go and move on.
I don’t remember, nor am I going to dig up the exact quote or thread, but I did go back once since I made this choice. While reading the comments section someone called someone else a “goats butt” and the words stopped me dead in my tracks. After being removed for some time, the words were extremely glaring and brought the entire two years of bantering into perspective for me. When I asked myself what value the activity possessed for anyone who read it, I couldn’t even justify it with an answer – so I simply hit the little “x” at the top right hand corner and haven’t been back since.
As a result, I’ve been able to focus more time and effort on more productive and meaningful articles that promote the value of YTB. Home life has become much more loving and fun – and opportunities have presented themselves that have produced a better financial foundation for everyone involved.
In addition, because I’m not being fed all this negative crap about how impossible it is to succeed, I’ve actually been able to resolve a couple of issues. One of the most time consuming over the last two years has been a dispute with a number of credit card companies who decided to change their rules and finance charges. Because I took exception to the changes and decided to fight, several suits were filed and a battle ensued in court. Because of various changes in legislation and because the National Arbitration Forum was not only exposed as a fraud but shut down, and coincidentally because I stopped reading how impossible it was, I resolved and cleaned up the mess I created for myself.
To state that I’m grateful to have these suits settled and dismissed by the plaintiffs is an understatement.
My family life has grown to new heights. Ronda has seen the changes in my ability to get more done now that I don’t spend so much time reading nothing more than insults, and I tend to be more responsive to the needs and responsibilities as head of the house. The kids are doing exceptionally well in school. While there’s always room for improvement, we’ve learned some new ways of motivating and helping them resolve any problems or issues they encounter. As a result, there is more open communication between us as they continue to learn and grow. Kids will be kids, and they’ll always explore boundaries – but there is far more confidence in our abilities to parent and help them grow into responsible adults.
We’re also spending more time together as a family. Not only have we spent time together on a cruise, but the holidays will also be spent with extended family for extended periods of time. Because I’m in the drivers seat with my own business and opportunities, we can enjoy this time together.
Lastly – and probably most importantly – I continue to be blown away over the readership of this blog and our newsletter. I started this blog back in 2005 and the newsletter a little less than two years ago. To see the traffic and the links created pointing here and how the newsletter has grown to thousands of subscribers is humbling. To think that an average guy like myself can have the following I’ve created and the friendships that have been formed because of both this blog and newsletter is a true testimony of what honesty, persistence, and a desire to help others can truly do. Each hit to this blog, and each subscriber that comes in for the newsletter is something that I give thanks for each and every day.
I believe that none of this would have come to fruition if I didn’t extract the negative and focus on the things that I should be grateful for in my life. Some of them are small, like watching my daughter actually empty the dishwasher and vacuum the rug right now. Others appear to be large, like the two year battle I endured with the with critics and the credit card companies. The point here is that no matter how big or how insignificant you might think anything is, you need to give thanks for anything that happens because no matter what it is – there is a valuable lesson to be learned.
If you can learn and grow – no matter how uncomfortable it might be to take responsibility and face it head on – that my friends is something to be truly be thankful for on the other side once you’ve been able to see the fruits of your labor and choices.
Be thankful and grateful – not just tomorrow – but each and every day with an attitude of gratitude and watch you life and circumstances change like it has mine.
Happy Thanksgiving all!
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Doug & Ronda Bauknight
AKA: TravelPro
Travel Agent / Networker
Phone: 678.458.5812
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