I don’t know how many actually remember reading “The Scarlet Letter“, nor how many have actually read this classic Nathanial Hawthorne novel. It takes place in Boston in the seventeenth century. A woman named Hester was sentenced to wear a large Scarlett Letter on her breast after it was discovered that her child was conceived from having an adulterous affair. She was deemed a sinner, and was publicly displayed as such. As a result, the town would hurl insults to humiliate her for having sinned.

Hester was publicly shamed – socially isolated and alienated for her indiscretion.

Three centuries later, most of us would consider such a public display barbaric – or at the very least uncivilized. I still see plenty of examples, mostly from my kids experience in school with one child’s attempt to shame another in front of their peers. (Remember seeing the “Kick Me” signs on the back of the class nerd?) As adults, we develop a higher sense of self-worth and self confidence in our own abilities that such behavior is no longer necessary.

The act of shaming another person is an attempt to gain power over another. The desire is to alter and shape another’s behavior or belief. It’s a way to communicate who is the outcast and who are the elite. Who is down-and-out and who is one-up. It produces an immense sense of power and control for the person dishing out the insults – using the other as a punching bag – while deflating the self-esteem and self-worth of the person being shamed.

I’ve never bought into shaming another person as a form of control – it’s just not something that I believe is effective or worthwhile. My recovery from alcoholism 20 years ago enabled me to develop a higher standard of self-worth, self-esteem, and self-confidence. My recovery also changed my perspective when dealing with individuals who attempt to shame others.

It was during that time I found they were the ones who are weak and insecure – not the other way around.

Think about it – if your position and confidence resided where you felt secure there wouldn’t be a need to fill any type of void by stepping on someone else to prop yourself up. Likewise, there wouldn’t even be a need to respond because your own experience and beliefs override any outside attempts to change that belief.

You’d already be whole or complete.

Seeing random acts of humiliating and alienating has increased for me over the last few years. In part, because I’m involved in a very emotional industry which provides average people an opportunity to run a home based business. On the one side, these same average individuals see an opportunity to get themselves out from under the bottom of the pyramid known as traditional business. (Starting at the bottom and never finding a way to work their way up the ladder, or pyramid.) On the other side, you find those who have either failed themselves in a short stint with MLM, or have bought into all the myths and stereotypes they find from reading.

A simple observation will quickly form the conclusion that those who have the least experience on either side are by far the ones who are the loudest and most obnoxious. Why? They don’t have enough experience or documentation to fall back on to support their beliefs or convictions.

Look at Coach, Scott, and Kim. All three have been extremely successful in MLM and their experiences extend back to the early 1980′s with A.L. Williams. Attempting to insert any of the myths, rumors, or stereotypes about MLM into their belief system is like trying to tell YOU the sky is purple. The opposition can jump up and down – scream at the top of their lungs – provide example of others who also think the sky is purple but you’re not going to budge. All those years of looking up to the sky and seeing blue simply can’t be overwritten or changed.

Think that example is oversimplified or outrageous? Possibly – for you. But those of us who’ve been a part of this industry and work it the right way know exactly what I mean. It’s something you can’t explain – like how kids will change your life. You have to experience it to realize the importance or relevance.

I was talking with my father last week about all the egg tossing and mudslinging that I see others get so wrapped up in. He told me he sees it all around us, and is thankful that he’s somewhat isolated now with my younger brother on their farm up in Pittsburgh. While my father is now retired, he still writes and teaches to keep himself occupied during the winter months on the farm. He sent out a publication to his subscriber base yesterday (of which I am a part of) and this one paragraph struck a chord with me after our conversation last week.

I know that rancor and incivility has existed before in the history of this nation’s politics. But seldom if ever has it been in the ugly stalemate we now experience. Neither major party will allow the other party to press any part of its agenda. Senators who argue vociferously on the floor of congress no longer later sit down to lunch or dinner with their other-party colleagues. The scene is ugly and disappointing.

Ugly and disappointing is something our entire Country appears to be trapped in right now. Incivility certainly isn’t reserved for critics of YTB or MLM. It’s a trait that’s been learned and developed throughout the years that frankly, like my father, makes me sick to my stomach. How humans can treat other humans in this fashion is deplorable and unconscionable. For someone to demand respect or a voice by using these tactics goes beyond any boundaries I’ve ever known. It’s a big reason why I have the rules that I do on this blog.

I’ve spent years documenting about my experience and what I know to be true about YTB and MLM here on this blog. You don’t have to agree with it or even read it if it bothers you. But it does have boundaries for those who are incapable of being civil or rational. It’s simply not a trait I’ve been willing to tolerate since I started this blog – and I’m certainly not going to change that position now.

For the life of me, I can’t think of a single example of how insults or humiliation changed or resolved anything. All it did was heighten emotions, not logic. You’d think some would get that. But as we’ve seen – even the brightest, most talented, most promising of individuals fall woefully short of reaching any resolution because they’re just too wrapped up in their own egos.

We can only hope (and pray) that someday they might grow up to become confident, respectable adults.

You never know…it could happen.

In the meantime, just put these people aside and focus on the things you can control and find enjoyable. There’s no pleasure or knowledge in reading insults.

If I can do it, so can you, and you’ll never know how much better life can be until you actually let it all go.

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I spent the last two days listening to the radio and watching news channels with a keen eye and ear on the Election. I normally don’t like to mix Politics with just about anything I do. However, what transpired on Tuesday evening was an historic event in our Country.

What we witnessed was a true triumph of the American story. An American first, and it gives me, as it should you, hope that we can be, do, and have anything our hearts desire in this great country of ours. A first generation American, (as his father came from Kenya) and the first African American as President. A true product of good education, dedication and commitment to achieve the highest, most prominent position is the world today.

I really don’t care which political party you cater to, I believe what happened on Tuesday was monumental in our countries history. While I was only a child when the Civil Rights Movement was gaining steam in the 60’s, I do have a slight memory of a very sad birthday when I was young, April 4, 1968. More recently I claim a special connection with Tony Dungy, the first African American Head Coach to win a Super Bowl with the Indianapolis Colts. Although my “special connection” is tied to Tony being a defensive back for my beloved Pittsburgh Steelers back in the 70’s.

I had a considerable interest in just how conservative proponents were going to respond to the election. I’ve been so use to bickering and finger pointing over the last two elections, (do I really have to bring up the hanging chads in Florida?) I have to admit; initially I was somewhat surprised over how some actually responded. They were gracious and like me feel that this was indeed an historic event in this countries history and needs to be recognized as such.

It was very comforting to see and hear how people could put aside their political differences and recognize the significance of this election when you consider what our founding fathers put in writing when they laid the foundation of this country stating that “All men are created equal”.

I heard a story on the radio about a 109 year old woman, the daughter of slaves, who voted for President Elect Obama. For those who were taught that this Nation would never elect an African American as President, how happy and overjoyed they must be to realize that what they were told or once believed was wrong. It’s not out of the realm of possibility that many of them have no problem being wrong, just this once.

I have to wonder how many people never gave the President Elect a chance because it’s “never been done”. How many let “odds” persuade them. How many thought the “facts” would prevent this African American from reaching his dream of the highest office in world.

The words “never”, “odds”, and “facts” are extremely overrated, only used by those that cater to the status quo.

When the nation was first introduced to the Jr. Senator from Illinois during the 2004 Presidential Election, I remember how intelligent and well spoken the man was. I knew nothing about his background, his family, or his political views. Now that he’s been elected as the next President of the United States I will add disciplined and focused to the list of qualities that make him qualified for the position that’s been set before him.

I can’t tell you how proud I am to be an American. We are a nation of achievers and dreamers. (Most of us anyway.) The true American spirit of triumph has been documented once again for every one of us to stand up and feel proud that the foundation of democracy is still very much alive and well in the 21^st century.

I wish the new President Elect success in his newly elected position. I remember when the exiting President came into office, many claimed they never believed he won as President and when he came into office they never accepted him as President. I never understood that type of thinking and I’m pleased to see that many of the people that I agree with, while disappointed in loosing this election, are wishing the new President Elect success and celebrating the momentous historical significance of our first African American President.

What a country.

Congratulations to those who voted for the Jr. Senator and our next President of the United States.

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There has been much debate and confusion about the Western Hemisphere Travel Initiative and requirements for Passports when traveling outside of the US. So much so, many of the trade magazines that I subscribe to (Agent at Home, Travel Weekly, and Vacation Agent) have dedicated entire articles to keep us informed in an effort to keep our clients informed about what’s going on. Confusion about the program’s deadlines caused panicked travelers to swamp passport offices, which quickly became overwhelmed by a volume of passport applications for which officials were unprepared. Eventually relenting to all the backlash from both business travelers and those that would have to cancel personal vacations, a proposal was adopted and passed to let U.S. residents and citizens arriving at airports from travel in Canada, Mexico, Bermuda or the Caribbean region re-enter the United States if they could show they had simply applied for passports.

Initially, the drop dead date was January 1st, 2007, but when both the cruise industry, and US Government realized that literally millions of Americans still did not possess the proper Passport for travel outside of the US, our current Administration postponed the date until today, October 1st, 2007. If you are planning a trip outside of the country past today via air travel, you need to have a passport in hand in order to get back into this country if traveling outside of the US.

I have to admit, what they feared was true due to many of our clients applying for and waiting anywhere from 6 to 9 weeks, sometimes even longer for their passports to be processed and in the hands of our clients. The US Department of State experienced a backlog of some 18 Million applications being processed over the last several months and times have been very stressful both for us as Agents, and our clients who were traveling abroad.

If you find yourself stuck without realizing that you need a passport or yours has not arrived due to the backlog with everyone else scrambling you can have your Passports Expedited for a nominal charge.

As a Travel Agent I know there are still some loopholes when traveling outside of the US via land and sea ports right now, but that will soon change and as your travel agent, you should have one anyway, so do yourself a favor, put this whole mess behind you and get a passport for yourself and your family so that when you do have a chance to travel outside of the US, you’re ready.

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